Much to be done.

All is better...er in the land of badgers and mushrooms. I still need to get help, but in the short term things are stable. I have to work on my abandonment issues, stop treating my relationship with M like an addictive drug, and a few other "symptoms" of abandonment syndrome that should clear up when I get a handle on things... I call it abandonment syn. I don't know if it is. But it gets the point across. It would be a good start to have something.... refreshing, something to help keep my mind focused. So I don't get lost in a small world of work and lathargy. Over the weekend I was... bitching, about my woman troubles.. rather my me troubles, and I was asked if I really needed a woman in my life. The answer is no. I don't need a woman in my life. I need a good friend. Not just good, someone I can be emotionally intimate with. But I have no family I can really call "family". My friends are more distant the older we get. And the few people I can confide in... well they have lives of their own. So girlfriend or not, I need someone in my life. Girlfriend is simply prefered. well not so simply, greatly... not to mention the physacal aspect of a gf.... ;) The origon thing still naggs at me though... She and I only had a few min, to talk so mostly I found out that everything was ok... I know there will be a reasonable explanation... A few things are still nagging at me but the hope is that once I fix some of my major issues that the rest will either "fall" into place, or will be that much easier to deal with. *sigh* long day, didn't sleep much sat, or sun. like 6-8 hrs total. almost off work so food and sleep are on the agenda when I get home....