tears for fears...

So I had this phone call yesterday. Nothing too unusuall. For no explainable reason it made something hit me. If I move with her to Origon, I won't just be moving with her. I will be moving in with her sister. Part of her reasons for going is helping her sister. It is really an excuse for her sister to run from a bad situation rather then stand up for her self. Then what happens if someone like that comes in to her life in Origon? We move again? I won't be moving with them. M wants to move with her sister. Despite what she says, she doesn't want to move with me. Im sure she wants it, but her "dream" of moving doesn't involve me. I want to move out of state, but not now. Once I have grown up more. Once my friends here are all, or almost all, gone. I can't leave yet. If whe wants to then she will be leaving alone. She didn't even talk to me about it. Just said she was thinking of doing it. If she wants me along why hasn't she talked to me about it? *sigh* Im gona bring it up tomorrow. If this whole moving thing is what I think it is then... I may find my self, alone again. My only fear is that if I don't go with, that I'll get lonly and regret not going with. *sigh* I guess I'll think more on that after we talk tomorrow. Once this is out of the way, then if we are still together, I'll get in to the other problems. In type this relationship seems alot more work then its worth. I just don't know...